BIO MP3'S PHOTOS MEMBERS SHOWS CONTEST GUESTBOOK DESKTOP WALLPAPERS MERCHANDISE MAIN
'We're the Metal Inquisition... We're not too hard to find...
Just don't get any closer..
We might just blow your mind!'
The Band Members
The Exalted Piledriver - Lead Vocals
An unrepentant 'old-school-fossil', Pile's been on the scene since before the invention of the compact disc, and perhaps even before the discovery of kerosene! With a voice like broken-glass-and-dirt, and a mind of rotting flesh-jelly, he wails like the sick, twisted, demented, psychotic arsehole that he is. We should also mention that he's a bit of a goof. A funny one, but a goof nontheless. A FAT goof!!!
Lobo Elf Schnort - Bass
A big bastard on big, badass, ground-shaking bass, Lobo likes eating all manner of small mammals. The smaller the better... he says they're crunchier. Sure, he's fukkin' amazing on bass, but... it's the small mammals thing that attracted Pile to him. He's arguably the 'intellectual' of the group, so the rest don't really talk much with him. He doesn't mind though. . . he'd rather while the time away plotting their collective demises, anyway. He's working on his 34th volume now. There's some really creative stuff in there. Truly disturbing, twisted, painful stuff. Creative, gruesome, cunning, and painful. Just ask the critters. . . he's been known to 'play' with his food. Have you ever seen a chinchilla used as a bass-pick? A leopard frog as a sub-woofer? A tortoise shell as a pickguard? Well. . . neither have we. . . we simply won't let him. . . we figger it kinda puts ya off yer dessert tray lookin' at those bleeding, screamin' critters from across the stage.
Kinky Pork Cream - Guitar
A monster of monstrous monstrosities, monstering his way up n' down monster alley, actin' all monstrous n' shit.. . . if you ask him, he'll be glad to talk about his monstrous tone, his monstrous chops, and his monstrous monstrosity of a crotch-monster. . . and the monstrous moanings it can produce in monstrous manner with all manner of molls and millies. . . we don't call him 'kinky' fer nuttin'. . . what a monster! Really! Have you seen it yet? Ugly, disgustingly fat and long, and festooned rather distractingly! I mean, seriously. . . that's MONSTER MEAT! I'm not one to look, but. . . ever tried to look away when someone's about to get hit by an oncoming vehicle, or just about to commit suicide by jumping or whatever? It's just like that. . . only veiny. . . and lubed. Monstrous to the tip, I tell ya! I only caught the briefest fraction of a tiny glimpse of it once backstage, and it felt like it had obscured my field of vision for over half an hour! A perceived half-hour in my mind that I will never get back, and never be cleansed of, no matter the voltage/amperage applied!!! Thank gawd he can play guitar! Cuz if he only had THAT thing to play with, we'd never get him outta the basement!
Glace Frothfritter - drums
Found tucked away at the back of a spitoon warehouse just south of the Arctic Circle during one of our bi-monthly 'time-to-bury-what's-left-of-the-bodies' trips, this frozen cadaver has re-animated in fine metal manner and possesses just enough motor-skills to pound the drums to the volume levels required by the Exalted One without the capacity to form actual words or conveyable thoughts, thus preventing his chewing our ears off with longwinded tales of his surely boring past-life in the wilderness foraging alongside a family of marmosets that took him in during the blizzard of '23. Snore-fest or WHAT! Like it even helped! He still died, you stupid marmosets!!! Lotta help to him you were!!! You delayed the inevitable by, what... 2 days? Pfffff. . . whatever. . . whatever's been left to die and rot eventually ends up in Pile's band. . . and inevitably in his belly!
Updated October 23rd, 2006 ©2005-2006 DogBite Records All Rights Reserved. Unauthorized Use Strictly Prohibited. All songs SOCAN